Patrick Bodger and The Money Pit

I have been in tears laughing at Patrick's Blog about the Money Pit. I feel guilty too. It is so wrong to squeal at someone's misfortune and it hurts so perhaps that's nature's way of paying us back.

You should write a book Patrick. It would be a best seller.

Tell the long suffering Marianna I said move  to Ireland.

Mad Mandy

Bushmills Inn Review & Response

Good Evening Mandy,

Again thank you for your reservation last Saturday and for your lovely comments. I hope you do not mind me taking the liberty to ask if all you guests enjoyed their lunch. As you suggested, I kept an eye out for a review. Earlier today I noticed a review from your guests on Trip Advisor which is quite opposite to your comments.

The Hotel has always prided itself on service and our staff are empowered to make an immediate decision to replace, change or refund a meal even if a dish is perfect but not to a guests liking, without fuss or embarrassment. If, on the day we had been made aware of any issues we would have rectified immediately. I am sure you can appreciate that it is frustrating for any business not to have constructive criticism at the time, affording us the opportunity to rectify.

With regards to cocktails, we do not profess to be expert in this area. As we are in Bushmills most visitors want to try the local ‘nectar’ We have limited cocktails available on our drinks menu as we do not have a large demand for popular cocktails let alone ones which are rare and have never been ordered in our short 25 year history.

The comment “outrageously expensive and poor value” is, we feel strong and misplaced,. I do hope they would take into consideration the total experience - not just the dish on the plate, but all the other factors which have to be paid for: e.g. the public sitting rooms, five real fires, car parks, gardens, menu and wine list covers even the cost of our staff who are paid intentionally attractive rates. Also our prices have to reflect what you are not getting - weddings, coach parties, functions, an overcrowded bar - we permanently close the street entrance to the bar so that it can remain more exclusive to residents and diners. Though tempting sources of revenue particularly in the quiet winter months, opening the bar to the street and taking functions would compromise our core business which is looking after individual guests and small parties but such exclusivity does have to be paid for. As a hotel, as opposed to a restaurant, we have to keep our Restaurant open for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day and as a seasonal resort property we run at a loss over the winter months. For all these reasons we have to charge realistic year round prices to achieve profits over a full year - but ultimately it is the customer, no matter what I say, who makes the final decision.

I hope you do not mind me writing to you, it is that your comments and your guests are vastly different. As mentioned in my email on Sunday night we would be delighted to welcome you all back again.

Kind Regards,

Kelly Neill

Bushmills Inn Hotel

THE RUBGY BALL and MORE

OMGoodness! When I wrote our names and telephone number on the prize draw for THE RUGBY BALL signed by Willie John McBride et al I told Tiger that I wanted it more than anything. How wonderful to have a piece of history touched by sporting hero's?

I cannot tell you how gob-smacked we were when Pauline rang to tell Tiger he had won it.

Believe me. It will be treasured.

Treasured beside the limited addition poster of the late great Joey Dunlop that Tiger's biker babe sister gave him for his birthday and the autographed picture that James "Wee Man" McCann gave us of him airborne.

We are truly blessed to be able to honour brave people who love, or did love, their chosen vocations.

I feel very moved and humbled by the work of the Royal British Legion and by the many groups that campaign and work tirelessly for charity. Joey Dunlop's charity work is a case in point.

Bill Kennedy, the outgoing Mayor of Ballymoney, deserves praise for his efforts to fund raise and support Marie Curie Cancer Care, the Ballymoney Hospice Support Group and The Community Rescue Service.

Bill Kennedy and Liam Beckett were instrumental in the development of first the Joey Dunlop and then the Robert Dunlop Memorial Gardens and the link between them.

They were undeservedly vilified at times, as was I for backing them. That is something that would not have gone down well with the lads. They wouldn't like it at all and would be really saddened by the actions of some family members.

The gardens and the link are a fitting tribute and it was lovely to see so many fans visiting and taking pictures. Paying homage.

No one can take them down or diminish them. So say I and I lot of others.

We extend our best wishes to the outgoing members of council and hope that the incoming elected representatives continue with the traditions developed by the hard working public servants who have retired.

There is much work to be done and we all need to play a part in that. There is no point sitting back and giving off if we haven't taken an active role in the community. The community that is all we have at the end of the day.

We have common goals and wishes. Good health care, including expanding care in the home. Education. Environmental issues. Policing and the protection of the vulnerable. It really is up to us to participate in a positive way ... Or walk away and bury our heads in the sand.

Memories

Tiger and I were watching BBC's Wild Week Live with the delightful Donna Traynor and enthusiastic nature lover Darryl Grimason.

What a joy.

It brought back memories of childhood fishing trips. Our dad had a punt. That is like a floating bath tub. The water lapped over the sides and we had to bale it out. Kids don't know what fear is. That comes with age and wisdom. We loved it.

The first time I saw a Basking Shark was when one got caught up in fishing nets and was dragged onto Portstewart Harbour slipway. Ian Henry told everyone that there was a big fish in the Harbour and he thought it was a shark. It was, and it was awesome and then some. At least it was for us. Basking Sharks are huge.We'd never seen anything like it. The shark was towed out to sea and later washed up on Portstewart golf course. The smell was putrid and permeated the whole town for weeks.

Many years later my brother Dessie and I were out fishing when a Basking Shark came along side. I nearly died of fight. It was two or three times the length of the boat and it's mouth was open wide. It could have swallowed us whole.

Dessie told me to calm my jets! He said it ate plankton and would spit me out if I fell in it's mouth.

I wasn't happy until we hit dry land and I was off that boat like a rocket.

Looking back I remember the wonder of seeing such a spectacular creature. A gentle giant. I would give almost anything to go back in time and put my hand out and touch him ... Or her.

Darryl got to swim with a family of Basking Sharks. How bloody marvellous is that? He was justifiably moved and awed. I was in floods of tears. I knew exactly how he felt.

WeeHee!

Tiger and I had a lovely lunch at the Bushmills Inn today in the company of Lord Belmont of Northern Ireland. The food was very good although the lads could have eaten twice as much ... actually make that three times more. We have agreed to go to Millside next time where we will need doggy bags. 
Another wee disappointment was that they couldn't make Tim and me Brandy Alexanders. We were looking forward to kicking off a late lunch with our favorite cocktail. I will email the recipe to the Inn. And one for Manhattans as they get a lot of American visitors. 
With any luck Tim will forgive me for making a mess. Why is it that when I want to make an impression I spill food on the table cloth and try to stick the fork up my nose instead of in my mouth? How the blazes does one miss a gob this size? Only moi.
He is too much of a gentleman to say, "Don't call me. I'll call you."
We had a great time. Good company is better than a fine wine.
The universe has a way of linking peeps who gel.
It is early days and I don't want to take Tim prisoner the way I do with Andy and David.
In any event I can't do it because the electric gates are fried.
So is my much loved Dell laptop. Never, ever leave a jar of strong pickles next to a Readers Digest Universal Dicionary balanced on your modem and walk away. Story of my life of monumental disasters and trail of destruction.
Tiger has loaned me his Purple Meany. He keeps looking over my shoulder to make sure I don't injure or kill it.
But this is the man who won't relinquish the remote control, even when he is asleep. The bloody dog is every bit as bad. 
Hopefully Tim will accept us for the Numpty's we are and be mates anyway.
I came home on a high.
Tiger still had the hungers, as I said. He and the Rock laid waste to two boxes of quail from Lidl.
As if the day couldn't get any better Pauline rang from the Rugby Club to tell Tiger he won THE BALL ... SIGNED BY NONE OTHER THAN WILLIE JOHN McBRIDE ET AL.
I am going to sleep with it.
HAPPY HAPPY DAY

ODE TO THE DEAD

 

I went to a wake the other night

'Cause a good Ceilidh band were playin'

They had propped the dear departed up

And to the beat I saw him swayin'

 

His fiddle was tucked beneath his arm

And a smile was etched upon his face

As the clock crept round to midnight

The band were pickin' up the pace

 

Mourners were whirling around the room

And still was flowin' like a river

The family catered for the crowd

And no one cared about their liver

 

More came to pay their last respects

When the pubs closed up at three

They brought carry-outs and barflies

Who never miss a gig that's free

 

As the night wore on into the dawn

The Ceilidh band began to flag

Their little lilting tunes slowed down

And the dancers feet began to drag

 

The corpse was stiffer than a board

And his face was paler than the moon

His smile was now a pained expression

The wake would need to end quite soon

 

The night took on a gruesome twist

The corpse had gripped his fiddle tight

And wouldn't fit into the coffin

Feck sake it was an awful fight

 

In the end they prised it off him

And he was laid to rest at last

In a place that brought back memories

Of his long and illustrious past

 

When I die I want to have a wake

With a jazz band and a comic turn

But I want to be cremated first

So I will be safe inside my Urn.

I'm not sure what to call this

It's Thursday, which strictly speaking makes it a week since I was at The Dudes fancy dress disco at the Royal British Legion Club in Ballymoney. It has taken me until now to recover.

I went as a cowgirl with a super soaker instead of a cold 45 strapped to my ample waist. Annie get your gun and all that.

The Dude was dressed as a large yellow feathered thing. I was confused as Katrina is the Chick. I may have been drunk as a skunk. Hang on a MO! I was drunk as a skunk. Thankfully I'm the only one native to Ireland. Skunk that is.

I can't thank Joe enough for mopping me up and delivering me home. If not for him I could still be walking in the direction of the hills.

It's a pity there wasn't a better turn out for such a good cause. Sign of the times I guess.

Apathy is settling in, in all walks of life. Voting, charity, protecting the environment, neighbourhood watch et al.

Mother Nature is trying to tell us something. Not that anyone is listening. It is easier to ignore what is going on than to get off our asses and do something positive.

Mankind is like a runaway train. Picking up speed and about to hit a very hard wall.

We all think we are bulletproof ... Or hope we are. What if we aren't?

Oh well. I guess we will never know. Thwack and we're gone.